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[Aug. 4th, 2006|12:57 am] |
ixdontxbelongx
new lj.oh.yeah.i forgot |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 12th, 2006|06:20 pm] |
oh.so.i'm back.and my laptop is back.and meh.
umm.what have i done this week then? iv not left homebase.i swear v been stuck to the floor there.
its been fun.iv really enjoyed it.i gottn to know people well and iv had leyland people to train.the nice girl, sarah, she is so like me in every single way its scary.its freakier her bf has known me for years and he lives on the next estate to mine.she doesnt really look like me but even people iv worked with for months confused us.uh.cool.
jessica said she'd ring me just to say hi when they move into leyland, marie suffers from problems with her nerves so iv given her confidence because shes like 60 and the rest are kids and dont talk to her, and rachel had a dream about me last night lol.fair enough, her dad ran me over in his car by acident and i was pale on the floor and she hugged me.bt hey, its the sentiment,
and iv gotten to work with dave again and bens been in today.i even made sure i spent dinner with him cos i felt like not being anti social.we got new phones today so we had phone training for an hour.and i got made fun of by the guy cos im so quiet :(meh
umm.and of course iv been seeing my wifey who i adore to bits and miss :(
i wish i wasnt home.hes pissing me off.my mums gotten all dressed up for some tv thing and i miss big brother.i said that just as dermott came on.eep.stupid jayne.
anyways.um.bored.
and i miss my lj friends :( |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|02:19 pm] |
perhaps i need to fuck this thing off and use my new one.it doesnt seem to matter how much i say or how hard i try.in the end i just get hurt.and fed up.and ljs are shit.
if you want my new one ask me. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|12:48 pm] |
a whole day of corey taylor courtesy of mark.fucking.get.in
im bored |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|01:12 am] |
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i feel so fucking ill :( im s fed up of this.i had the most violent scariest dream again last night s that meant only another 1- hrs sleep.fuck.fuckup. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|12:50 am] |
its gonna be fucking shit if chris has to move back to scarborough, even if over summer
i fucking love my best friend.if it wasnt for him i dont think id be here.i sound dramatic but nobody knows how much he does for me
fuck
FUCK
thats it.he's coming to manchestoh with me :( i cant beaqr to miss him again so much
plus he needs stealing.
im shit.i hate myself more each day.fucking hell why am i still here |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|12:21 am] |
iv totally fucked up todays exam.i misread the qu till ten minutes to go
joanna was like thats the easiest exam iv ever done
meh
oh well |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 27th, 2006|12:17 am] |
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is it just me or does anyone else get freaked out by how different johnny depp looks in every film he does? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|12:19 pm] |
my lj seems to be spelt incorrectly every single entry and it bugs me.also.sorry clyde for the myspace picture.it wasn't meant to be so.uh.funny.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargghhhhhhhhhh i dont know what to dooo in my exam.
who cares about tattoos? who cares even less about king arthur.so forget him.i never want to hear about tattoos again after today
anyway.i should really go.and not forget pens this time.
good luck chris.you wont fail.and im proud of you.though you'll never read this.
meh.its better than wednesday.or not
im bad at spontanaity.i cant even spell it
some.fucking.english.student. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2006|11:51 pm] |
my phone's going to be full of old school happy dance music like la bouche & boby brown.for when im down.ooh rhymage.
IM BORED |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2006|07:17 pm] |
i don't think idv made it through without this song every day at college
meh.not its on tv.or the tv.um.now i love it more
The world seems not the same,
Though I know nothing has changed.
It's all my state of mind,
I can't leave it all behind.
I have to stand up to be stronger.
I have to try to break free
From the thoughts in my mind.
Use the time that I have,
I can't say goodbye,
Have to make it right.
Have to fight, cause I know
In the end it's worthwhile,
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away.
It will be alright.
I know, should realise
Time is precious, it is worthwhile.
Despite how I feel inside,
Have to trust it will be all right.
Have to stand up to be stronger.
I have to try to break free
From the thoughts in my mind.
Use the time that I have,
I can't say goodbye,
Have to make it right.
Have to fight, cause I know
In the end it's worthwhile,
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away.
It will be alright.
Oh, this night is too long.
I have no strength to go on.
No more pain, I'm floating away.
Through the mist I see the face
Of an angel, who calls my name.
I remember you're the reason I have to stay.
I have to try to break free
From the thoughts in my mind.
Use the time that I have,
I can't say goodbye,
Have to make it right.
Have to fight, cause I know
In the end it's worthwhile,
That the pain that I feel slowly fades away.
It will be alright. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2006|05:32 pm] |
watching football in the kitchen means i get to see them score before my parents do : )
small things |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 25th, 2006|05:09 pm] |
work was alright.new staff were in again for leyland.theyr all really immature and young.one said 'iv never used a microwave i dont know how' another replied 'i used one once.i put foil in it.it set on fire.id advise not to do that'
fucktards
nah.some of them are ok.the rest are immature 17 year old bois who think they're'it'
how the fuck they'll give advice about diy let alone know what things are is beyond me.as i had no idea at 19.
anyway im bitchy.umm.football.ooh. football.
ben stared at me all dinner.i dont like people doing that :( it means i have to talk and cant revise or pretend to |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 24th, 2006|10:25 pm] |
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aw mark and helen broke up again :( am i meant to talk to him on msn? meh im a shit sister. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 24th, 2006|08:59 pm] |
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i shouldn't be negative when iv had a good day.i never show how much i appreciate or love people.im just stupid.its what matters.not all the shit things that happen under this roof.its not even them.its me under this roof tahts the problem and the fuck up |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 24th, 2006|08:33 pm] |
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i need to get thin.tomorrow i'll start again.im sick of despising my interior.the least i can do is fix the outside of me |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 23rd, 2006|01:30 pm] |
07894819080
i have a new numberrrr |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 23rd, 2006|09:33 am] |
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i might have to cut the m key out of this laptop :( it just appears in everything you type |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 23rd, 2006|12:53 am] |
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i just want normality back.explanations.i want msn and email and text to FUCK OFF.they're fucking destroying me.tearing me apart
its a never ending circle.nothing stops.nothing starts again as new.as perfect.
this is fucking wrong.my wifey and i are us.,we're mnot fucking meant to be argueing.we're meant to be us.who can talk about absolutely anything and everything.who can sit for hours and just talk and smile and feel safe.
i jsut want to stop being me now.iv had enough of it.all i do as me is drive people away.destroy myself in the process.wrists can bleed to fuck tonight.i dont care.
exam revision cant happen cos im too busy crying my fucking eyes out over being me.the me that drives everyone away
i just dont want to be me anymore.once exams are over im out of here.out of this world.if all i do is experience being the me that loses everyone i dont want to be here.i really cant hack ikt anymore.
everything i say is coming out wrong.i just want to throw my laptop and phone until they smash into a million pieces.
I FUCKING HATE THEM.
i fucking hate this.me.every fucking thing
i jsut need to sit and talk.i just need to explain..i cant deal with another day passing by this way
i cant fucking do it anymore
im me.i dont doubt anymore.i dont see negatively.i dont.i dont.
i just want to fuck off because all the happiness has just died now after i finally got it back
iv died again
i do not give a fuck. |
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